When I remember to prioritize motherhood, Mondays are more beautiful. I am not rushing to do anything, I do not have any plans, and the kids can sense my presence. Probably because I ask them what they feel like doing, instead of telling them what the day holds. They notice I am looking at them rather than at my phone. There are more hugs, more laughs, more silliness and less chores, less separation, less tantrums. My mind isn’t focused on what to make for dinner or what to order on Amazon. They aren’t pulling at my pant legs and begging me to look at them.
Of course, this comes only with preparation. It doesn’t magically occur. Intention is key. Instead of planning out what the day will look like, I plan out how it’s going to FEEL like. Examples of words I jot down are:
- Relaxed
- Fun
- Full of Life
- Adventurous
- Calm
- Connected
- Rejuvenating
- Silly
- Creative
I aim for what we need at the time. Some seasons are full of life. Others are just whiling away at home. I used to be go-go-go. That’s partially my natural tendency and partially my upbringing. Listening to what is actually beneficial to us rather than what is comfortable to me has been helpful. I am learning how to be mindful alongside my children.
By the way, it helps to include the mother in those needs. Of course, the children have energy for days. The itinerary would be adventurous all the time if they were in charge. But that’s not sustainable for us as a family and me as a mom. I need to make sure I am not drained, otherwise it will be a bad experience for all. So I plan to wake up very early to do my workout. That requires sleeping early the night before. I also plan to have a moment of peace with my coffee, and to have breakfast prepped before bringing the kids down. During their naps, I allow myself to nap too. Or drink an espresso in the backyard on sunny days. Or snuggle up with a book under an electric blanket when it’s cold.
In the transitions between activity, I tidy along the way. But I don’t harp on having a clean home. Simple acts such as piling everything in the sink so the counters look clean without taking my time away from the kids is a game-changer. Asking the kids to “help” also is a creative way to be together, while also being productive. Helpful tasks I delegate include:
- Putting the shoes away after a walk or trip to the playground.
- Helping throw diapers in the trash.
- Sweeping up breakfast crumbs.
- Baking a sweet treat or dessert for lunch.
- Prepping baby’s bottle (big brother loves to do this).
- Putting books back into the basket (they love to sing the “Clean Up” song).
Other things I do to prep for an intentionally PRESENT Monday:
- Dock the phone during family time.
- Put my Airpods in during our walks and trips to the playground. I can listen to a podcast (my favorite one lately on motherhood is The Homemaker’s Club) while I push the kids in the Veer wagon.
- Opt for leftovers at lunch.
- Let go of perfection.
- Get outside! Honestly this is the best life hack. There are less distractions for me and the kids, they get their Vitamin D and fresh air, and it keeps the house tidy.
