At the beginning of the month, I posted on my Reset Dental Studio Instagram account that I was excited for No:vember. It was an intentional affirmation that as the season got busy, it’s okay to let go of the “shoulds”. I followed my own advice and really dropped everything in terms of work. In exchange, I chose to be a present mom. Holidays are so magical and in this short season of motherhood, I know that future me would be disappointed to look back and realize she missed it. Plus, this was the first year that we included Sadie’s birthday celebration to the mix. Between my mom, Sadie and father-in-laws birthdays, both sisters visiting from Madrid and New York, a brother visiting from Arizona, two weekend getaways, two birthday parties, AND Thanksgiving, I honestly had no choice but to follow my own advice.
I was grateful though to have had the intentional post already written and mentally processed. It became less of a decision I needed to make when the time came. Dropping work wasn’t even a question. Organically, I just focused on what’s important. Without guilt, shame, worry. That’s what daily writing and mindful living does. The peace is there knowing that this was the choice I would have made all along. My actions are guided intuitively because I already know what I want the outcome to be.
On Black Friday, we decorated for Christmas in the morning by hanging up stockings and this Advent Calender for the kids. We filled it with ornaments from Big Little Universe and explained to Casey that every day they get to open one ornament and hang it on their miniature tree that sits in the center of our dining table. I also plan to insert a notecard with a holiday activity for each day. My husband and I used to have a FREE holiday activity advent calendar before the kids and I’d like to carry that tradition forward. After having kids, my husband and I switched to a daily coffee ritual with 19 grams’s advent calendar. We love guessing the tasting notes of each espresso shot before the kids wakes up and the coffee kicks in.
We went on a bike ride in the afternoon. Sadie rode in her bike seat for the first time. Looking over and seeing Casey grinning from ear to ear and hanging on by Mikey’s shirttail was just the cutest memory. My husband really enjoyed being out there too. This made me happy, because sometimes I forget about his experience. We followed it up with holiday lights viewing after dinner and a dance party outside one of the homes. The day ended with milk and library books on the living room floor.
It was many years ago that I wrote the post Thoughts on the Blackest of Fridays. Having just reread it, I realize that my writing has processed a lot of the rituals that weren’t aligned with who I was. It has grounded me. I am proud to be living up to my values now.
And as No:vember wraps up, I am trying to think ahead to December. Honestly, this season is so magical for me. The frosty mornings, sunny afternoons, the smell of California sagebrush and coyote brush (“Cowboy Cologne”). But what’s more magical is the changes that come with it every year. Casey was so enamored by holiday lights last year, but this year, he just flits past. He is more interested in the houses that play music so he can dance. Instead of holding our hand as he toddles along, he wants to sit on dad’s shoulders way up high. I look forward to all the moments.
I hope to write every day in December to process the year thus far and the year to come. And as a form of meditation for this very busy season. The repetitive act of looking at holiday lights after dinner and reading library books will probably be a thing. Only because I know it’s not forever. By next year, Casey can probably read books on his own. One thing is for certain. I’ll carry on the ethos of No:vember through the rest of the year and it will be a tradition to embrace in the years to come.
Photo by Maddi Bazzocco on Unsplash
