Curated Wardrobes: Maternity Clothes

Moons have passed since I’ve spoken about curating wardrobes, but I figure maternity clothes deserved a spotlight. The thing I miss most during this entire pregnancy isn’t the weekly tuna sandwiches or the cups of foregone coffee, but the ability to wear jeans on any given day. When it comes to getting dressed, I have (pre-pregnancy) mastered a formula that has simplified my routine, limited my wardrobe, and made me feel good. In general, it followed the guidelines of black tee, comfy jeans, one of two jackets, and a pair of Birkenstocks. Since getting pregnant, I’ve broken my reliable Birks, outgrew tiny black tees, and no longer fit in my jeans. Thank the heavens for maternity clothes.

Futile Resistance

When I first began my pregnancy journey, I was dubious as to whether I would actually need maternity clothes (HAH!). I didn’t announce my pregnancy until my fifth month. Even then, people were shocked to learn the news. At least, they acted like it (Thank you). Perhaps the yoga teacher training that I was taking during months 2 to 5 kept me in shape. Or the Turkey Trot I ran in month 4 shed some pounds. It was eventually replaced by a whole lotta turkey that very same evening. Eventually, my disillusion wore away, as my belly expanded over the holiday season where baby ran amok with his own holiday feast.

I didn’t upgrade my clothes until month five. I am fortunate to have a tiny frame, which also means that regular clothes have a boxy, loose fit on me. The years have taught me how to rock-it with my shapeless, petite figure. In the end, loose-fitting clothes served me well, as they transitioned into ever-tighter fitting maternity clothes. But for the majority of them, the fit was comically wrong in certain places. My clothes rode up, sagged down, or somehow achieved both in the same day.

I had resolve to resist buying clothes that would serve me for only a few months. It seemed wasteful from a monetary and environmental standpoint. I thought about buying ‘regular’ clothes in the form of flowy dresses or loose jumpers that would be wearable even after baby entered the real world. But alas, I can’t live life in flowy dresses all the time! The first person to buy me maternity clothes was my husband for Christmas, after seeing my confidence wane. When I succumbed to the pressures of a growing belly, I compromised by committing to my usual standards: neutral colors, versatile cuts, and only a handful of them. If I had to cave, it would be on my own terms.

After wearing maternity clothes for a few months, I have to say it’s definitely worth it. I wouldn’t have guessed to grow as much as I did, but the babe will gain half a pound per week towards the last few weeks. As in, there’s still a long way to grow.

Curating Wardrobes: Maternity Clothes

A gal can go crazy with maternity clothes. I mean, I never knew I had body image issues until I became pregnant. Mostly, because I had no body to be conscious of in the first place. But once I started growing, I realized how one could fall down a rabbit-hole of buying maternity clothes that make them feel (and look) good.

Some women swear they love their figures during pregnancy. I find this bolus in the middle of my body difficult to man-handle. Read as: this is all quite frustrating for me. My bowling ball belly prevents me from bending over my patients or getting close enough to them to work. It prevents me from doing my usual exercise routines. Like trying yoga inversions without toppling over, doing a push-up without scraping the floor, sitting up with no core to speak of, or even walking up the stairs with twenty extra pounds to carry. Even picking up dog poop on my dog walks became challenging.

For me, function mattered most, but there was the issue of appearance too. There were maternity clothes that saved me, and then there were maternity clothes that were beautiful and gifted to me by those who knew I wouldn’t allow myself to buy them. Meaning, the former ones allowed me to feel like myself and live life as normally as possible while the latter made me feel comfortable and confident. I’ll separate the lists into such categories.

Maternity Clothes That Saved Me

FIGS Maternity Scrub Pants: These are so comfortable to wear! My co-workers have been lending me their regular scrubs as I got bigger and bigger. One lent me an XS in month 6 and now I am outgrowing another co-worker’s size S at month 8. I’ve already requested to borrow a medium for my final month of work! But I did buy ONE pair of black Maternity Yola Skinny Pant and they have grown with me from month 5 until now. I know it will last me during the entirety of my pregnancy, and unlike sizing up in regular sizes, the maternity pants fit in all the right places, all the right ways. If you are early on in your pregnancy and working in health-care more than a few days a week, I would get these pants for work. Seriously, it was the best purchase for me.
FIGS Rafaela Oversized Scrub Top: These tops are NOT the FIGS maternity tops. I purchased a maternity top from the company but the cut was all wrong. For starters, the maternity top was way too long! It went to my knees (quite literally), which also says something about my height. And it wasn’t exactly that flowy. I didn’t want a belly that stuck out too much while I was working. Luckily, I already owned a few Mandarin Tops from FIGS and my usual XXS size has lasted me thus far (8 months). In fact, the fit is SO GOOD that a majority of my patients have no idea I am even pregnant. Seriously. The length hits right, and the flowiness covers my bump completely. I am happy that I owned these before, and can still use them after my pregnancy. It is the most versatile scrub top for women.
Beyond Yoga Leggings: Towards the end of my yoga teacher training, I was still trying to squeeze into my size 0 Lululemon pants. I have since sold them on Poshmark because they’ve started to look like pants that would fit my baby better than myself, and I heard that our bone structure changes after birth anyway. But what I did do is trade them in for Beyond Yoga’s Maternity Leggings. I have owned Beyond Yoga before and would go so far as to say that they are the softest, most comfortable leggings on the planet. So I knew that their maternity line had to be the same, and comfort is key. The stretchy belly band really molds to your growing baby. I wore these to my final yoga sessions religiously.
Eileen Fisher dresses and rompers: I already owned a number of dresses and rompers from the brand Eileen Fisher. I can attest to the fact that these looked good on me pre-pregnancy and served me well during pregnancy too! The cuts of EF are boxy and looser-fitting than other brands, and this brand is the only one that lasted me the full eight months without an upgrade. I think it’s worth a mention, as it saved not only me, but my wallet too!
Oysho: I fell in love with this Spanish active brand when I went to visit my sister in Madrid. So when my parents went to Spain this year, it was all I asked for! Oysho has a minimalist MUM section, from which I got some leggings and biker shorts. My sister also gifted me a loose-fitting pajama set that I have been wearing during the day, too! They ship to the US and are worth a gander. I like all their products, so even if you weren’t searching for maternity clothes at this very moment, you’ll find great active and lounge wear on their site.
Old Navy Basic Tees: I got a pair of long sleeve V-neck tees that I wear all the time! They come in black and white. If I was working in an office, I would have bought five or six of these tees and one pair of maternity denim jeans. That would have been my daily attire. Old Navy is a great source for cheap maternity wear. But because they aren’t high on the sustainability charts, I only opted to nab a few.

Maternity Clothes That Look Great

Nesting Olive House Dresses: This house dress isn’t your old-school, boring duster. I was gifted a Nesting Olive House dress to try and I have to say that it is versatile, cute, comfortable, and seriously so useful! I literally can wear this for days on end, no matter what I am doing. I have worn them as pajamas, to lounge around the house, to do chores in, and even to run errands. When I have my periodic melt-down about not knowing what to wear to dinner with friends, my husband always suggests the Nesting Olive House Dress because he knows I can eat to my heart’s content without feeling constricted, and he knows I feel confident in it. That’s a game-changer for all maternity peeps! You can find my Instagram review of this dress here.
Vuori’s Alpine Sherpa Jacket: My parents gifted me this jacket in size XS for Christmas. I am pleasantly surprised to report that it fits really comfortable and hides my growing belly! The boxy cut is flattering, and I can wear these with my maternity yoga leggings from Beyond Yoga and Oysho. I literally have worn this jacket every day since receiving it. It is warm, comfy, and really utilitarian. Just my vibe! I own it in the Olive Green color which is sold out, but this one is a very similar jacket.
Isabella Oliver: My husband gifted me these 100% responsibly sourced, European made, zero-plastic packaged maternity clothes and I love it! The cuts are made for taller European figures, but I don’t even care. These were so comfortable around the waist that I have lounged in them for hours on my days off. Many a blog post was written and books read.

Now you may be wondering, where’s the rest?? But that’s all I invested in! If I had deeper pockets, or a less strict environmental conscience, or more room in my home, I might have been willing to try buy more options. For example, this Storq dress would have been lovely. And I was curious about Hatch’s maternity jeans (did I mention I REALLY miss my jeans?). I also would have loved to snag a Jenni Kayne cardigan. I probably would have felt cool in her over-sized poplin shirt as well. However, how much does cool factor really count?

Going down a rabbit-hole of buying more clothes wasn’t going to change the way my body looked, or improve my lifestyle one bit. It wasn’t going to help set us up for financial success, or allow us to spend more time with the baby once he arrives. The clothes would have been temporary fixes to a problem that is centered around vanity. For those reasons, I couldn’t get myself to buy more than the basics.

This post was written with the very best brands in mind. I hope this post helps point you in a few right directions. But I also hope it serves as a reminder that you don’t need to buy them all. Yes, some days you will wake up feeling VERY PREGNANT. For those days, pick a few good staple items to act as your best friend. But for the rest, make do, get by, and keep on keeping on. The baby will not care one iota what you look like in the photos, I promise.

Photo by Sarah Dorweiler on Unsplash

Family Growth in a Tiny Home

I suppose I wasn’t surprised when concerned friends and family started inquiring about what we were going to do with our living situation once the baby arrives. One of the first questions Mike’s mom asked was, “Where do you expect to put your baby? Surely not the downstairs bedroom?!”. My own mom piped in presumptuously, “Eventually you’ll need to move into a bigger house.” Mike’s dad was more concerned about how we were going to fit “all their stuff” in one room. Only my father offered to help move furniture around. But I’ve had my fair share of tiny spaces and fielding questions and comments on living in such. And we’ve decided as a couple to do as we always do, and make family growth work in our tiny home.

A history of tiny dwellings

It seems humorous to us that our own parents voiced concerns. We both grew up in tiny spaces. Mike lived in a two bedroom apartment with his dad and sister until college. He shared a room with his sister during childhood, and then with his dad in his teen years until his sister left for college when he was 17 years old. Apart from his senior year in high school, he essentially shared a room with someone until he graduated college. After which, he moved into a house with his buddies and upgraded his room to a garage. Absolute freedom.

My own story was similar. I moved ten times before high-school. While we sometimes lived in houses big enough to have our own rooms, we also lived in two bedroom apartments (thrice!). For six months we stayed at a one-bedroom Extended Stay America. The most cramped memory was when we immigrated to the United States. For about a month, all five of us slept in my father’s co-worker’s office space. My mom, dad, and brother shared a full-sized bed while my sister and I slept on the sliver of a floor between the bed and the computer desk. We weren’t even allowed to roam outside of the bedroom except for the few hours that the owner was away at work. My brother co-habited in my parent’s bedroom until he was three years old. And my sister and I definitely had our fair share of sharing spaces.

Our current tiny home

This may sound silly, but I realize that Mike and I have chosen tinier and tinier spaces. In the end, we kept arriving to the conclusion that less is more. Our first loft together was 1,595 square feet, which we rented the first year and a half of our marriage. The second loft which we purchased was 1,500 square feet. Comparable in size, but with a larger footprint downstairs, which we rented out. So our living space was slightly reduced to under 1,000 square feet. When our roommate left, we sold that property and sized down even further. Our current tiny home is 1,318 square feet. Similar to our first two lofts, this one has the secondary bedroom downstairs.

We live in a tiny home. That much is undeniable. However, I don’t find that as problematic for family growth as the layout. A split-level townhome (described as an ideal bachelor pad by a neighbor-mom who also lives in the same floor plan) isn’t exactly conducive for family living in the traditional sense. The upstairs space is about 900 square feet (or less?) comprised of the living area and the master bedroom.

My gripe is with the second bedroom. Located on the first floor, it has a tiny stand-up shower in the bathroom and is positioned right next to the front door and the garage. The walkway to neighboring townhomes looks directly into the second bedroom. As a parent, I may worry about being on a separate floor, in case of emergencies. I also wonder if it’s bad that a stranger passing by would be geographically closer to the baby than we would. The solution may be to move the nursery upstairs.

Deciding on Family Growth in a Tiny Home

In the grand scheme of raising humans, I still find this banter on how tiny a home is to be quite frivolous. In the end, we have decided to stay, for now. I have found a solution by way of a bassinet on casters that would solve for the “where to put the baby” problem. Call it stubbornness, but I find the challenge to be endearing. I’d like to rise up with creative ways to exist in our current situation.

Expansion is the American dream. The solution for most people is to buy more stuff. Quick fixes solve problems, yes, but only for a quick amount of time. Mindset shifts, which take much longer, could result in more permanent solutions. We’ve spent the past six years of our married life finding ways to cut back – whether it be on waste, spending, stuff, to-do lists, social norms, expectations or space. These more permanent solutions are what yield the temporary one for our family growth in a tiny home dilemma.

Since we’ve always wanted to dabble in real estate, we have the fall-back option of buying a bigger space and renting this one out. However, like all else in life, I want to see what ‘staying and seeing’ yields. At the very least, I want to wait until the baby arrives to see what lifestyle we want to lead. Will we both work part-time and parent part-time? Will we resume our previous career schedules and make the same amount of money? Or will we value this tiny home as a means to stay close with our child, both geographically and because we don’t have to work and be away as much?

I have found peace with our decision in the mothers before me who have navigated similar terrain.

Erin Boyle managed family growth in a tiny New York 500 sq. foot apartment which she called home until her third babe was born.
Alison Mazurek lived with a baby (and then two…) in a 600 square foot apartment in Canada until past toddlerhood.
Our neighbor Leah is raising her son in the same townhome layout as ours, and he is thriving.
My own mother managed three wild children in a co-workers bedroom.

At the end of the day, I’ve landed on the same conclusion as when we adopted our cat Theo: There is always room for loved one. Family growth will be just fine in a tiny home.

Simple Things: Miniature Baking Tins

This year, I have made it a personal goal to try more baking recipes. And whilst I don’t need more baking items in my pantry, I did end up buying this miniature loaf pan set that I’ve been pining over for years. It has taken me this long to pull the trigger because I felt guilty about adding another item to our kitchen. But after having them, I just think these miniature baking tins from Williams Sonoma (aff link) are as jazzed up as I thought they would be. Zero regrets! So I figure I’d dedicate a post to their wonderfulness.

My sister-in-law has had a set of four miniature baking tins since her twenties. Her aunt gifted them to her for her apartment. Space-saving, these tins are stackable and store nicely in a tiny space. They are non-stick, making them hassle-free to clean, and easy to turn out. And they don’t get locked up when stacked upright.

Conveniently, one loaf pan recipe divvies up neatly into the four tins. As someone who hopes to bake more in 2023, I love that I can try new recipes without committing to eating all my sweets. Baking for two tends to yield excess, so we are constantly walking pastry down the block to my parent’s house. But now, I can have entire mini loaves, giftable to friends, neighbors, and even my dental staff. It will also keep me from ingesting too much sugar 🙂

After baking my first item in these (Tartine’s Banana-Date Loaf!), I have found that reducing the bake time to 3/4 the amount to accommodate for the smaller pans worked well. Of course, keep an eye the first time you try every recipe. The best way to test for doneness is to stick a wood stick in the middle and see if it comes out clean.

I found these tins at Williams-Sonoma (aff link). At under $35 for the set, they were a real treat for me! I mean, I have trouble spending that much on dining out. Knowing they’ve been on my mind for a while, my husband convinced me to get them. I already know that they will be of great use! I was actually debating on decluttering my bigger loaf pans after getting these to clear up kitchen space. Regardless, these will inspire me to try new recipes. I’ll make an effort to post the successful ones throughout the year here too, so do check back in!

Caraway Home’s Timeless and Minimalist Cookware Set

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Our home has always had its center around the kitchen. Cooking over a stove, arguing over a new recipe, or silently eating our dinners is how we spend time with each other. Every event we’ve hosted for friends and fam had people gathered around food and drink. Whether it’s croissants and coffee or dinner and wine, there was always Mike and I behind the stove whipping something up and listening to our guests carry on conversations. I prefer to watch them devour our hard work rather than partake with my personal anecdotes and opinions. My place isn’t at the center of the party, but rather, behind a pot, stirring something or other with a wooden spoon. A linen apron serves as my party outfit, and I am quite satisfied with that kind of life.

After five years of hosting every Friendsgiving event and celebratory milestone, it became decidedly noticeable that the pots and pans gifted to us on our wedding day were well-worn. All were Teflon pans advertised as non-stick but alas, everything eventually stuck thanks to my penchant for high heat. Their self-sacrifice did not go unnoticed.

The fry pan was the first to go. It didn’t even make it to year five. But it did do it’s time, patiently frying eggs and bacon, English muffins and grilled cheese. The wok was next, after a stir-fry gone wrong. Well, the stir-fry was fine but I let water simmer to remove the sticky sauce from the pan and one should never walk away from a stove with the flame on. Of course I forgot until the smell of smoke reached my nose while I sat on the bed, lost in a book.

Surprisingly, what still works is a Dutch oven bestowed unto me by my mum. It has been around for twenty-plus years, begging the question of degrading product quality control. We have a few other pans that, frankly, made it strictly because of their non-usefulness. A flat griddle I thought would make pancakes efficiently turned out to have just that singular purpose. A curved griddle that I thought would be useful for meats, burgers, and paninis was deemed non-essential. These things are biding their time. But the workhorses are long past their hay-day and needed some serious replacement.

As I belabored over options, I gathered a few requirements for our next cookware set. Over the past few years, I’ve developed an almost snobbish resistance to my Teflon pans. The reasoning behind it is hazy. Something about PTFE being carcinogenic and generally bad for our health. In fact, I’ve added a few cast irons to our kitchen arsenal (mostly for bread baking) since our wedding day in order to transition away from Teflon. However, the cast irons were too heavy for my taste. Close calls with sprained wrists made this particular dentist stray away from heavy options, despite being good alternatives.

I also required that the new cookware be minimalist. Classic pots and pans that would last the test of time are what I was after. I needed only a few essentials (forget the kitschy griddles and one-offs), and I needed them to store well. By now, we’ve honed in on how to manage a tiny space. We’ve also learned multiple techniques for preparing food, so that we didn’t require silly items such as ice-cream scoopers and garlic presses. No, the set I wanted would just be the mainstays of home cooking. After searching high and low, I finally found what I was hoping for in Caraway Home.

The Caraway Home Cookware Set is what we decided to embrace. It is free of PTFEs (like Teflon), PFOAs, and other PFAs such as lead, cadmium or other toxic metals. They also avoid hard anodization processes in its production. So what is it made of? It has an aluminum core coated in a non-stick ceramic with stainless steel handles and hardware. Meaning, it’s not as heavy as a rock. Yes the steel handles get hot, but I happily trade wearing oven mitts to lift the lids in exchange for ingesting carcinogenic metals any day.

In terms of quality, it stands the test. The pots and pans can withstand up to 550 degrees Fahrenheit in an oven. It is stovetop agnostic, compatible with induction, gas, and electric stoves. The bottom of the pans are metal, making me wish for one of those posh electric stoves popular in Scandinavian kitchen these days. Since we have metal grates, I have to make a mental note not to drag them across the surface. The pans heat up efficiently enough on low to medium heat. This time, I’ve made a promise to avoid high heat as they shorten the life span of any pan.

If you were wondering whether non-stick ceramic works well, I can attest that it does. Minimal oil and butter is needed, and the foods simply slide around the pans and pots! We’ve made a switch to using only wooden spoons and silicone tongs and spatulas. I have a fear that metal cooking utensils would scar the beautiful cooking surfaces. Plus they are so easy to clean. Mike and I are babying them, as we wash them with a soft sponge (no rough sponges or metal scrubbers please!) and dry them right away.

But the selling point that really got to my minimalist heart was the storage system that the cookware set comes with. It was the deciding factor, and honestly, the thing that most millennials would value the most. As more of us turn to tiny homes, apartment living, and nomadic van lives, the adage “less is more” has never been more appropriate. The entire cookware set stores well in half of a single shelf of my pantry. Magnetic pot holders stack them vertically as a beautiful canvas hangs on the pantry door storing the three lids. The storage system mimics Marie Kondo’s vertical folding of clothes, giving you easy access to whichever pot or pan you need. Visually, you can see all four at once. Gone are the days of shuffling through a stack of pans to get to the wok you need.

If you’re less of a home cook, but are planning to get married, move homes, upgrade your kitchen, or go off to college, I still think Caraway Home’s cookware set is worth taking a gander. In case you need very little, they have a minis duo set that 18-year-old-me could’ve made do with cooking for one. At the current discount price of buying a set, the cost of upgrading your cookware is quite affordable. And we really do love them.

Now I have my heart set on replacing our bakeware. If I said we cooked a lot, you should see my baking trays. They used to be silver, but now, coated in butter and grease and left in ovens a smidge too long, they are unrecognizably black. Copper-colored rust coat the edges of the rims. I just can’t bear to bake another batch of croissants on them. Caraway’s bakeware set has an aluminum core with stainless steel handles which I hope don’t rust. And the storage system is drool-worthy as mine are shoved haphazardly inside the pantry. There’s just no way to horizontally stack circles, rectangles and muffin tins, I swear!

The multiple color options speak to multiple styles, but I’ve got my eyes set on the navy for the bakeware set. I chose a cream color for the cookware and have some slight regrets on not being outgoing. However, I wanted the cookware to be timeless for both Mike and I. The bakeware set is mostly for me, leaving room to take a chance on color.

Our Minimalist Scandi Inspired Dining Room

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After a year of living in this ‘new’ home, we finally have ourselves a dining table! We’ve made do thus far with a flimsy fold-out table that was my computer desk in middle school. It still had a mouse pad permanently glued onto one end. Rickety screws fell from the underside if you knocked it just right. I was constantly worried our meals would collapse onto my beige rug, or that the dogs would swing the legs out from underneath. Now that a dining table sits center-stage, I can finally find peace in our minimalist Scandi inspired dining room.

I originally had my sights set on Menu Space’s Snaregade Rectangular Table in Black Oak Veneer. But after eleven months of delays, I decided to give up on it. To which my mom replied, “What took you so long?”. As I called to cancel our order, the customer service rep informed me it should ship out in two weeks. Fool me ten times, shame on me.

However, providence has a way of working, as we ended up finding an alternative within a week of cancellation. A neighbor happened to be selling their one-year-old Hay Copenhague Deux 210 Dining Table in perfect condition. I got really lucky, as my requirements for the dining table were Scandinavian in brand, with a stream-lined silhouette in the color black. Frugal me also caught a break, as we were able to purchase it “used” at a mere $600! Or as Mikey would call it, “Ikea prices”. This ended up saving us over $1,000 from our original table choice.

Without risking sounding a bit woo-woo, I truly believe that saying no can lead to better yeses. I had my doubts about the original table from the get-go, having painfully labored through pros and cons when I first ordered it. None of the cards ever did line up. Luckily, my minimalist forte lies in the fact that I can make do with what we’ve got for a long period of time. That table ended up acting as a stand-in for something better. It’s been four years of homeownership and almost six years of marriage and we’ve just now bought a REAL dining table.

I was already familiar with many of the Scandi brands: Menu Space, Skagerak, Frama, Hay and Muuto. So when this Hay table showed up on my radar, it was quite a quick (and easy) decision. It was completely aligned with my values: minimalist, functional, beautiful, and affordable. Designed by Ronan and Erwan Bouroullec, you can find Hay’s dining table at Design Within Reach. We happened to find ours listed on Craigslist, which is also where we bought our Ikea couch.

I am ecstatic about it, as our dining space is the center of our home. We love to entertain people by way of drink and food. Gathering around a meal gabbing the night away is exactly how we prefer to socialize. I also adore it as I do a lot of my writing and work on the dining table. It has been such a joy laying out my plans for the week or typing away into my laptop at this new station. A new laminate based on nanotechnology makes up the surface of Hay’s Copenhague Table. It has an ultra-matte surface with a soft touch that is anti-finger-print and easy to clean. I’m considering getting rid of my WFH desk altogether and just working from the dining space!

Shop Our Scandi Inspired Dining Room

dining table | dining chairs | rug | pendant lighting | mirror

10 Cozy Fall Scented Candles

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I’m not the type to buy seasonal decor. There are many reasons why. I don’t like to store them, spend money on them, and swap them out every season. I know some look forward to these transitions, but as you can tell from this post, I’ve gone and missed most of autumn and am just now posting about cozy fall scented candles. However, in lieu of pumpkin throw pillows and orange wreaths, I do like to still pay tribute to the changing seasons. I just prefer to it by way of scented candles.

I like candles because they are consumable goods. They don’t add clutter to my home, yet they imbue the feeling that I need. They aren’t an eyesore and take up little real estate. Yet the smell of the best scented candles can make one feel fuzzy with emotion inside. Nostalgia rolls in as scents of pumpkin spice inspire me to bake something sweet.

My obsession with candles run year-round. Guests often comment on how nice the house smells, which brings me so much joy. To be honest, I would run candles all day if I could. I save the really nice ones for hosting or special events, but the good thing about candles is that there are many affordable options out there too. This list contains a mix of both splurge options and savings options. As the nights run longer, I’ll be bound to light them more frequently. There is nothing cozier than writing and reading by candle light.

10 Cozy Fall Scented Candles

Jenni Kayne’s Musk Glass Candle *aff – notes of spicy cardamom, amber, sandalwood and orchid $65
Public Goods Cedar and Suede – a soy candle option that doesn’t break the bank $8
Le Labo’s Palo Santo 14 – energizing freshness without the overwhelming smoke – $82
Hearth and Hand’s Harvest Spice – clove, vanilla, chestnut and amber
Magnolia’s Gathering Candle – coffee, pumpkin, and nutmeg – pumpkin spice in candle form $28
Noa’s Fall Festival Candle – toffee, apple, caramel and vanilla – all the sweet stuff $48
Homesick’s Autumn Hayride – just like it sounds, the smell of hay, amber, clove, birch and oakmoss $38
By Redo’s Safran Candle *aff – a complex 6-hour candle that smells of black pepper, saffron, dark amber and vanilla – among other notes $90
Aesop’s Ptolemy Aromatique Candle *aff – woody and earthy, this candle gives off scents of cyper, cedar, and vetiver $110
Brooklyn Candle’s Italian Escapist – cardamon, clove, orange blossom, vanilla and incense $38

Photo by Storiès on Unsplash

Shop Our Living Room

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The winter light is coming back around to the living room side of the house. This is the beginning of my favorite time of the year. Cold weather, foggy mornings, warm blankets, cozy snuggles, and more. It’s what I love most about living in our mountain home.

This morning, I spent time re-arranging the furniture. Changing the lay of the land makes it feel like I’ve upgraded the house when I really haven’t done much. Compared to what this space looked like when we moved in a year ago, we really didn’t add by way of decor or furniture. It’s mostly the same old. Part of what I do with intentional living is keep the minimum amount of stuff, and use it to create fluid environments. Sparking creativity by moving things around rather than buying more STUFF is kind of my forte … and the means by which we are able to tackle my massive student debt.

Today, it was swapping the sectional to be an L-shape against the other side of the living. This opened up space for opening our balcony door to allow the Fall air inside the home. Yesterday, we acquired a neighbor’s cute dog bed, which was kindly gifted to Theo after their doodle outgrew it. It deserved a lovely corner space in our living room and inspired the mirror swap. The Drink Morning espresso machine remains within easy reach, in case coffee is of the essence as I read in my Menu Space lounge chairs. It is my favorite way to make the perfect cup of coffee stress-free. You can read my review of it here.

The couch is the Insta-famous Soderhamn from Ikea. We bought most of the sectional from Craigslist, then added the ottoman and an extra chair. Ikea furniture is cheap enough, but Craigslist saved us a few hundred bucks. We then remodeled the couch with Bemz covers from Germany. You can read about the project here. This couch, when coupled with Bemz, is so modular that it’s timeless! We’ve had this couch since our last space, along with the Ikea media console, and the Menu Space lounge chairs.

You can also see our bare white walls. I wrote about this choice way back when we lived in a live/work loft. My thoughts haven’t strayed much from it. Occasionally, I argue with myself about the possibility of hanging our best travel photos with Artifact Uprising’s beautiful frames. But the hassle of choosing favorite places has really kept this project at bay. Instead, I chose a shaggy rug from Nordic Knots that acts equally as a form of art. When I read how this Stockholm-based company collaborated with Danish artist Carsten Beck Nielsen, I just knew it was a piece I wanted to add.

“It’s fascinating to see how different an artwork is experienced when it’s on the floor rather than on the wall.”
Carsten Beck Nielsen

We also opted to go with the 65″ Frame TV so that we may throw up some artwork on there with the changing seasons. We are so happy to have chosen it. I have never been a TV person growing up, preferring paper and books over screens. However, if I am being honest, watching 30-45 minutes of TV with each other in the evenings is a really nice way to spend time with each other and unwind. It’s become part of our routine, and I can finally see the relaxing benefits of it. I also really love that it can act as artwork when people are over. I wrote a really thorough review of the Frame TV here, because I know it’s a big purchase decision. If you’ve been on the fence for a while, check out the pros and cons first!

Since our living room items never really change, I figure I’d type up a style post about the stuff I do keep. If you wish to shop our living room, here’s what we’ve got.

Shop Our Living Room

The Anti Anxiety Therapy Notebook That Rewires Negative Thinking

I waited more than a month to write about Therapy Notebook’s Anti Anxiety Notebook. I felt it was important I give it a proper review. Now, I can affirm that this is, without a doubt, the most useful tool I have used to date to rewire my negative thinking. I can’t wait to delve into the positive aspects of this book. It is a revolutionary way of addressing mental health, especially for those who don’t have the financial means, time, or space to seek out a therapist in person.

Let me start by saying I have no background in psychology. Although both of my sisters specialized on the subject, I personally have very few tools to improve my own thinking. I have a history with mental health, having experienced depression in my 20’s and anxiety in my 30’s. It took half a decade to figure out how to heal from depression, and it is taking just as long with anxiety. But the fact that I did move on from depression really proves that there are ways to undo harmful thinking. This book has empowered me in ways I didn’t know it could.

Before delving into the anti anxiety notebook, here are a few related post on mental health:

How the Anti-Anxiety Notebook Works

The Anti Anxiety Therapy Notebook applies the science of cognitive behavioral therapy. An introduction in the book walks one through separating the objective facts of what happens in our lives from the subjective narratives we attach to those events. We attach narratives in an instant – most of them are thought processes ingrained in us from childhood or our formative years. Deconstructing reality from our perceptions is a thinking process that takes practice. It starts with awareness. Properly asking yourself, what happened (physically) without judgement or bias requires effort.

Identifying Emotional Responses

Once you’ve separated what actually happened from what you perceived happened, it is time to address your feelings around the event and your thoughts. A feelings wheel in the appendix illustrates the emotions that can we can feel. I was surprised to learn that some emotions I thought I was feeling are actually a misdiagnosis of another, more accurate emotion. For example, when I felt nervous, I realized that the nervousness was rooted in fear, a fear of disappointing others or letting them down. Likewise, when I feel anger, sometimes it’s really because of embarrassment or shame. I used to think I got angry at people when really, I was most angry with myself. The feelings wheel really helped me narrow in on the most accurate emotion.

We tend to name an emotion and land on it, but reflecting on what other emotions are leading us there is crucial to our understanding. Emotions, like narratives, are reactive in nature. Usually, it is a repeat response to similar situations from our past. Analyzing those responses and peeling back the layers requires patience. All of this takes time. The journal has helped me to sit down with my emotions and identify them properly.

Cognitive Distortions

Once your emotional state is identified, the journal asks you to question the thought patterns that brought you there. Before this book, I didn’t know what thought patterns were. They are actually referred to as cognitive distortions, because of their inaccuracy and reinforcement of negative thinking and emotions. These lead us to think things that are unhelpful and untrue. There are 12 distortions described in the book:

All or Nothing Thinking
Blaming Others
Catastrophizing
Emotional Reasoning
Fortune Telling
Labeling
Magnifying the Negative
Mind Reading
Minimizing the Positive
Overgeneralization
Self-Blaming
Should Statements

When I first started using the book, I made assumptions on my thinking tendencies. I thought the patterns that I fell into were Magnifying the Negative, Self-Blaming, and All or Nothing Thinking. I was surprised to learn that the traps I usually fell into were Catastrophizing and Fortune Telling. This makes sense now as my mind tends to lie in the future tense. A lot of my anxiety and negative emotions come from my fears that project out what I think could happen in the future. I realize that more often than not, my predictions are wildly dramatic and unlikely to ever happen.

Rewiring Negative Thinking

The last section challenges our brains to rewire and think in a new way. It begs the question, how can you think about the situation differently. I use this section to brainstorm all the different interpretations available, the possible outcomes, and the alternative emotional responses. This part of the process is cathartic for me. I imagine living in a multi-verse, where a different version of myself will think and choose to act in a more positive way. Then I choose which version of myself I want to be. This gives me more control of the situation’s end result. For me, that bit of control releases my anxiety.

How This Journal Helped Me

After using this journal for a month, I am less anxious about the things that once worried me. For one, it has shifted my attitude towards gratitude. It has increased my ability to be kind and to forgive. It has also increased confidence in my abilities, and removed some of the stresses of “What-Ifs”. Now I know that even in the worst case scenarios, there will also be a silver lining. I can’t stress enough how much improvement this book has given me in one month! If you wish to start your journey, I really do recommend this book. And if this is any indication as to the healing effects therapy provides, then it really is worth a try, for those who have been debating about it for a while.

What’s In the Journal

The Anti Anxiety Notebook starts with a few key points on how cognitive behavior therapy works. Interspersed throughout the pages are quotes to reflect on, as well as 5 coping mechanisms: Changing Mindsets, Mindfulness, Sleep, Positive Relationships, and Distraction. There are also empty pages scattered between journal entries, with enough room for a brain dump. I use this space for reflection, doodling, venting, and more. At the end of the book are 3 very useful appendices: CBT Basics, Cognitive Distortions, and The Feelings Wheel (my favorite resource!).

As for the journaling portion, the book includes dated pages where I was able to jot down events that caused anxiety. Questions I was forced to ask myself were:

What happened? (describe the situation)
What is going through your mind? (describe your thoughts)
What emotions are you feeling?
What were the levels of intensity of those feelings?
What thought patterns do you recognize? (more on that below!)
How can you think about the situation differently? (challenge your thoughts)

Is this book for you?

I have no experience in receiving therapy in person. But I know this to be true: Therapy Notebooks provided a way to map out my thought patterns and cognitive biases in my own space and my own time. Although it is made by therapists, it isn’t a replacement for therapists (if that is what you need). However, it does bridge the gap between those who can and cannot afford therapy sessions. The notebook lowers the barrier to getting help, when perhaps you don’t have the means to pay for it or the ability to leave work or home for a proper chat.

If you do end up trying it, I am curious to see how it serves you.

This post was written in partnership with Therapy Notebooks, a company looking to empower people with tools that improve mental health. My anti anxiety notebook was gifted to me by the company to try. As a practicing dentist, I experience anxiety every time I go into work. I also experience daily anxiety at a much lower level, because my thoughts tend to lie in the future, which is unknown. Part of my suffering is caused by a longing to control my environment and outcomes. That coupled with a culturally ingrained need to get along with everyone and avoid causing ripples in the proverbial water. The thoughts, opinions, and experience noted here are of my own.