Intentional Living: Night-time Skin Care Rituals with True Botanicals

This post may contain affiliate links. Please see my disclosure to learn more. 

There are routines, and then there are rituals. One is a basic repetition of activity, the other carries a more sacred underpinning. There IS a difference. That old adage of “It’s not so much what you do, but how” applies here. I believe that the former helps facilitate fast-living, whereas the latter defines slow. And while my planner is chock full of routines to get me by, my heart lives for the tiny rituals that ease me into and out of my most trying times. I have a list of morning rituals that prepare me for a brand new day, and a set of winding-down evening rituals that release the stresses I’ve managed to corral under my skin.

One of my nightly rituals is skincare, a relatively new focus of healthcare for me. I began 2020 on a journey to find out why a year-long battle with a skin rash has been untreatable by my dermatologist. Tired of getting nowhere and purchasing a million chemical formulae stuffed into plastic tubes, I reached out to a wellness coach instead. Turns out, the best solution I’ve found is reducing stress. Also avoiding chemicals and eating fruits and veggies. I ditched those plastic tubes and switched to amber glass bottles.

DSC01979

I am a big lover of natural concoctions packaged in glass. I know that the appearance of a product might prove vain but that’s the thing with rituals. Beauty matters because it helps to pull at the heart strings. Rituals are one of those things that require sentiment. I also feel happier knowing that my products do not contribute to plastic oceans.

Glass bottles, however, are more than just beautiful. They promote purposeful movement. I am more careful with breakable containers. I take my time setting them down, never rushing through my skincare regimen. As for the “natural” part of the equation, I am more at peace knowing that what I am absorbing through my pores is nothing more than certified non-toxic ingredients.

Mind you, I am not talking about Aesop.

A previous Aesop devotee, I am here to announce that there is a new amber glass bottle in town.

DSC01985

True Botanicals has swept me away with their collection of skin products. Carrying conscious ingredients of the natural and organic variety, they’ve got your well-being in mind. They are equally as focused on spreading their skin intel via their blog “Rituals“, providing know-how to their avid subscribers, as they are sharing their products. I think talking about skin is just as important as treating it.

I have switched my night-time ritual to be 100% True Botanicals-based. I start with the RENEW Nourishing Cleanser, which has very gentle and milky on my extremely dry skin. I only use this cleanser in the evening because I find that cleansing twice a day leads to even drier skin. In the mornings, I simply wash my face with water so that I can keep a little natural oil on me. Oh and this thing smells amazing! Scents of grapefruit, lavender, jasmine, and vetiver put me right into that relaxing evening mood.

I follow up the nourishing cleanser with a gentle pat-dry. I take the Nutrient Mist and spritz, patting around my face and waiting a few moments for it to absorb. This Nutrient Mist has been my best friend all summer. It is a must-have at the beach as well as on the plane. I carry it around with me whenever I leave the house. It’s small size is perfect to carry.

Lastly, I use the RENEW Repair Serum after moisturizing. With a dose of free-radical fighting ingredients fighting for me in my corner, I have nothing to fear. This serum has been said to equate if not beat La Mer. I can personally feel plumper, tighter skin. More importantly, it feels hydrate without feeling grease-stained. They’re calling it a miracle in a bottle. I can get on board with that.

DSC01990

Other rituals reserved for the evening:

  • Drinking matcha tea for a little detox.
  • Limiting phone use after 9 pm to reduce blue screen exposure.
  • Unwinding with a book before bed.
  • Lighting candles, sometimes.
  • Turning on the Humidifier with Vitruvi’s Sleep Essential Oil Blend.

Gift Guide: Well-being and Mental Health

This post may contain affiliate links. Please see my disclosure to learn more. 

Well-being and mental health have become increasingly imperitive for those living life in the fast-lane. I count myself in the tally. Before switching to a slower pace, I was constantly in a state of low-grade panic. Instead of taking breaths, I was holding them in. I was literally throwing away my life force towards menial tasks that got me nowhere. I was also throwing my money around like it was free. Sound familiar?

Twas nice to finally put on my metaphorical brakes and force myself to a complete STOP. Well, if I was being truly honest, it was COVID that gave my life pause. There were a couple of weeks where I literally had nothing – no job, no responsibility, no travel plans, nowhere to go, no one to see. The stay-at-home mandate was a sudden wake up call, as well as a slight shift in perspective.

I had already been pursuing slow living, but it was still a pursuit. With me, everything is a pursuit.  Even doing nothing is a pursuit. Who could blame me? Our society trains us from day one to achieve. Which competes with our wishes to be.

Anywho, we could all use some healing right now. This month, I alluded to mental health as being one of my main foci in my August Goals post. Whether you have yourself or someone else in mind, here is a gift guide for well-being and attending to our mental health.

  • A planner centered around gratitude and intention.
  • An app for meditation.
  • Live plants and natural surroundings (try their monthly subscription!).
  • Reviving products for stressed out skin.
  • Happy pills, but good for you.
  • The gift of good sleep (with $40 OFF a purchase of $200 or more).
  • Beautiful sheets that prompt a whole day in bed.
  • Towels worthy of a bath soak.
  • Pillows for sinking into and creating reading nooks (with 15% OFF using my code: debtist15) .
  • A beautiful new mat for an early morning routine.
  • Something soft for our weathered feet.
  • A polish whose proceeds are donated to a non-profit helping those with mental illness.

Less Waste: Period.

This post may contain affiliate links. Please see my disclosure to learn more. 

I’ve already dedicated an entire post on less waste and periods when I first spoke of how I managed my visits from Mother Nature using a single cup. But I feel as if this requires a revisit, for the glaringly obvious reason that there are a few scenarios wherein Lunette failed to prove itself a friend. While the cup has been mostly sufficient for all my feminine care needs, I have found that when it comes to travel, a more dependable plan B needs to be in place.

Walking down the streets of Mexico City does not seem like a problem, until you realize that their bathrooms generally don’t have private loos that contain sinks in the same stall. Where to empty a cup? Even if sinks were available, could one trust the running water? The last thing I want to do is explain myself in Spanish why I have a bacterial infection while wallowing in pain from the ever-so-common downfall of all menstruating persons.

Likewise, traveling on a 15-hour flight to New Zealand and Australia isn’t much fun with Lunette. While the airplane does have a private sink, the tight quarters make the entire process tedious and, once again, I worry about running water. Always the water.

Still determined to find a way of managing my monthly miseries that’s good for the planet as well as good for me, I decided I needed a plan B.

So I thought of Thinx. It’s a purchase-with-purpose underwear that has a mission to provide reliable access to safe menstrual hygiene products for those in need. With partners like Girls Inc., Safe Horizon, and the Alliance of Border Collaboratives, Thinx plans to expand access to basic hygiene products and community services like reproductive healthcare and mentoring.

On top of that, it is a REALLY good product. I am a minimalist by nature, who does not subscribe to single use items. This means I do not buy pads or tampons, at all.  Thinx checks those boxes for me. It is a re-usable panty that is reliable in what it claims to do which allows me to continue living life scotch free of worry or discomfort.

Thinx has versatility, with multiple styles to fit your personality and preference. I own the boyshort in black which I wear under my running shorts, the sport in dusk which I wear under my leggings, and the super hiphugger for my everyday needs. Each style has a different level of protection, so that heavy flow days could be as carefree as lighter days.

And the upkeep is simple too. Hand-wash in cold running water and hang to dry. I have only three pairs but by hand-washing right after use and cycling between them, I can survive an entire cycle without missing a beat.

Lastly, it saves people money. If I assume that a box of tampons is purchased every month, with each box costing $7 (to be on the more conservative side), then there is a  savings potential of $84 a year. The Lunette cup lasts you 3 years, so that adds up to $252 in savings. I would wager Thinx can last longer than that. It may seem like chump change but let’s assume all females adopted Thinx over the course of their entire life. And for each Thinx purchased, let’s say it saves another female in financial need from buying tampons and pads. You create a whole chain of events that end up saving the world a lot of money, and the oceans a lot of waste. Not to mention saving young girls in low-income communities from missing school and other opportunities.

Just think.

What a world that would be.

DSC01923

Intentional Living: Vitruvi

The world’s been pretty topsy-turvy. The trees outside the bedroom window have assumed their once-a-year summer blooms. Bright pinks and yellows littering our skyline, but I haven’t had the time to notice. I teeter-totter between slow-living and stress, which makes the time pass with such speed. I haven’t taken the time to stop and ask, but now I do.

“How are you?”

Are you coping like us? Is there suffering? What can I do?

During this time, I hope you are finding time to focus on wellness and mental health. I know I haven’t had as much as I would like, but I sure as heck try. It’s all we can do, anywho.

One of the things I’ve been attempting is simply breathe.  Essential oils by Vitruvihelp to set the mood I need to get through one more day. Or rather, one afternoon after an especially trying work day.

DSC01891

I don’t have a fancy humidifier by any means. I have a plain white bulky thing that I purchased about a year and a half ago using a Nordstrom gift card which I received from my father-in-law. It was a gift for turning thirty. I think the humidifier is meant for babies. Either way, it works.

DSC01883

I add a dash of Vitruvi essential oil blends to get me in the right mindset. I prefer the blends because it simplifies my life. Of course, if you’d prefer you can order the essential oils separately and mix your own potion.

I love turning on the humidifier and using the SLEEP blend right before bed. Think fresh linens and soft florals. It runs until I wake in the morning. It is also a good choice during a soak in the bath, or while reading in bed. Other great evening blends are NIGHTCAP and DUSK.

DSC01884

In the wee hours, after I’ve had my morning coffee, I switch to the BOOST blend by Vitruvi. Notes of Juniper, Grapefruit, Bergamot and Lime really liven me up as I write a long list of things I want to get done. If you are struggling to face the day, perhaps switch out the task manager with a list of things you are grateful for.

DSC01890

Point is, scents have the special ability to take us to places we are fond of. There’s a blend for all your needs.

Dreaming of vacation? Try RETREAT.

Wishing you were outdoors? Reach for GROVE or PACIFIC.

Hoping to get some deep cleaning done? Turn on CLEAN SWEEP for inspiration.

I know it isn’t much. But during times like these, anything that helps us breathe easier and experience life better is absolute gold.

This post is in partnership with Vitruvi. All thoughts and opinions are my own. 

Intentional Living: Hydration

This post may contain affiliate links. Please see my disclosure to learn more. 

When I was younger, I was too busy for water breaks. I would only drink water at lunch and dinner, consumed by my long to-do list of juggling three jobs and school, plus extra-curricular activities. I couldn’t give up a minute of my time to take a sip, because there were more important things to do. But times have changed. You could say I’m still the same person (busy as ever) who has taken a turn with regards to hydration.

Drinking water has become such a high priority for me that it is the first thing I do when I wake up and the last thing I do before bed. My planner and daily agenda notepads have water intake indicators to keep me on track. Despite having an active and busy lifestyle, I make sure to give back to my hard-working body by staying hydrated. I keep a glass with me at all times – whether I’m blogging on the balcony, writing notes in between patients, heading out to run errands, or reading a book in bed. Hydration, after all, is the ultimate form of self-care. Water not only refreshes our bodies and maintains balance, it also provides us with energy.

DSC01239

The KINTO workout bottle makes sure that I accomplish just that. I am a lover of good design, and the Japanese company KINTO delivers. They embrace minimalist aesthetics without neglecting function. When I was looking for a new bottle to accompany me on my everyday routines, I definitely focused on both practicality AND beauty.

I am always carrying my water bottle with me everywhere, with the running joke between my husband and I that I would likely die of “the thought of thirst” if I left my water at home. Therefore, I was searching for something light and portable. The transparent, sporty BPA-free bottle has an elastic attached to the lid that makes transportation care-free. In all honesty, it’s a product that simply fits “right” in my hands. I can just as easily hold onto it by the tab (if it’s the only thing I’m bringing with me, for example when going on a run) as I can throw it into a bag.

DSC01207

Additionally, the bottle has two removable lids. The top lid gives way to a narrow spout from which I can glug unabated by the thought of spilling water all over my shirt. The second lid can be removed if I wanted to throw in ice, fruit or garnish to liven up my drinking routine. Sliced cucumber is a luxurious addition and makes for a pretty display. However, it is important to note that dry ice and carbonated drinks should not be housed in the bottle to prevent breakage or damage. Of course, that’s fine by me since I’m not a fan of sparking water or other carbonated drinks.

One of the factors I considered when researching the right bottle was the ease of cleaning. I love that all KINTO products use a removable rubber stop that prevents the growth of mold or residue build-up from occurring. All five pieces (if you include the rubber seals) are dishwasher safe and do not require immediate drying. This, along with the light weight of the bottle, is the reason why I chose the workout bottle over their more famous and popular travel tumblers.

DSC01230

As silly as it sounds, I also appreciate the measurement marks on the sides of the bottle indicating how much water it contains in ounces and millilitres. The bottle holds up to sixteen ounces of water, twelve if you’re adding ice or fruit. Like the planners, the marks help keep me on track with my water intake goals.

The bottle comes in many colors, but of course, I chose the classic clear . I have gotten many comments on its minimalist style and simple beauty. I definitely think it’s a piece that deserves applause. No wonder it’s featured in MoMa’s well-curated Design Store. KINTO always seems to hit the nail on the head.

DSC01200

Habits to create around drinking water.

  • Drink a glass of water the minute you awake every morning. Leave a glass by your bedside every night.
  • Drink water after you finish your morning coffee.
  • Order water at a restaurant and drink a full glass before your meal arrives. Not only will this curb your appetite and monitor how much you actually eat, but it will help the digestion process.
  • After a workout, drink an entire bottle.
  • To increase the chances that you’ll drink water, keep it where you can see it.
  • Add sliced fruits or hibiscus leaves to make water more enticiing.
  • Drink water without ice barring exceptionally hot days. It helps with digestion.
  • Drink a glass after every meal.
  • Drink a glass before bed.

This post is sponsored by KINTO, a Japanese company that focuses on bringing tableware, drinkware, and interior items that bring its owners a sense of joy. Each of their items are heavily considered for the ease of integration into one’s lifestyle, without sacrificing the beauty of everyday things. All thoughts and opinions are my own. 

For those wondering, the water in my KINTO bottle is not sparkling water. However, we have a filtration system in our home that selectively removes and adds in certain nutrients, in order to optimize our water for coffee. This may explain the slight bubbling that you see in our filtered water. Also, acidic fruits should be avoided, since the bottle is not made of triton and the acidity could damage or mark the bottle. 

Below, I list a few more KINTO favorites.

Monthly Goals: May 2020

This post was sponsored by Smitten on Paper but all opinions, thoughts, and tips are my own. Smitten on Paper is a paper company based in Monrovia, CA. They have daily planners as well as wedding services including invitations and thank you notes. They also host a number of workshops, for those into stationary and calligraphy.

I always get questions about how I get so much done. Balancing blogging, dentistry, dog-sitting and once a bakery on top of being a wife, sister, and daughter can seem like much, and people often wonder, “How can you even consider yourself as someone who lives a slow lifestyle?” But I do.

You see, a slow lifestyle isn’t just dawdling on the couch reading, or sitting cross-legged on a meditation pillow for an hour in zen (although I also do both). Slow living is all about being mindfully in the present moment. Not surprisingly, when you choose to live slowly, you get more out of the time you have.

Once of my favorite aspects of slow living is intentionality. In order to have time for the things that matter to you (books, exercise, bread, whatever it is that excites you and lets you call this a life), you need to be intentional with what you do. Most people are not intentional enough. They try to do thirty different things at once, instead of honing out the single chore that will get them to where they want, fastest. It is this minimalism with what you choose to do that paves the way to slow living.

DSC00931

Creating Goals

On the first of every month, I write down the goals I want to accomplish. I list personal goals, work goals, home goals, health goals, finance goals, and leave a category for “other“. However, just saying I want something done doesn’t actually get it done. I tie each goal to a habit that I want to form that will get me there… slowly.

Why habits instead of tasks?

When habits are formed, they stay for good thereby improving you over the long-term. When tasks are performed, they are checked-off and dropped, never to be seen again. The difference is that habits make your future life EASIER. You store certain actions that make you 1% better each day in such a way that, eventually, takes no extra energy. Once a habit is formed, it becomes rote motion, thereby making you more efficient. Aditionally, your brain power is now reserved for other thoughts or actions. You compound the interest invested in yourself, and you continually get closer to the person you want to become while also gaining the freedom to stack on even more goals and habits come next month.

Starting this month, I wanted to share with you guys my monthly goals on the first of the month. More importantly, I will share the habit I tie to them, to demonstrate how I use talent stacking to make me one bit more efficient each day.

The goal isn’t the important part. I don’t care if I don’t reach it at the end of the month. It’s the habits that I track. I mark my top habits and physically track them on a daily basis using Smitten On Paper’s Weekly Agenda (#gifted). It is my favorite planner, and the monthly goals page is so helpful to keeping me focused.

I note the goals here in the following manner: GOAL –> HABIT

I hope this is helpful.

May 2020 Goals

 

DSC00921

PERSONAL:

  • Decrease phone use –> Dock phone when at home, do not allow the phone at the dining table or when in conversation with others, remove the Instagram app after every use to add a barrier to habit-scrolling, set screen time goal of 30 minutes or less per day.
  • Show self-care —> Remember to wear the NG every night and turn on the humidifier before bed.

WORK:

  • Get more affiliate projects for the blog –> Apply to at least 20 affiliates, get at least 10 partnerships
  • Increase blog views from last month –> Post at least five times a week and get another podcast on the books
  • Get through dental continuing education classes —> Do one online course every day on Mondays through Thursdays

HOME:

  • Keep the home tidy –> Put things in their proper place once you are finished using them.
  • Make it look neat –> Make the bed every day.
  • Keep it clean –> Run Roomba every other day, deep clean the house every other week.

HEALTH:

  • Get into a workout routine –> Run or do yoga 6 times a week, Work up to running 6 mikes.
  • Protect the eyes –> Wear Blue-light glasses from TheBookClub

FINANCES:

  • Limit spending –> less than $250 in groceries and dining out, less than $75in gas
  • Increase income –> Make bonus on a daily basis
  • Tackle loans –> Take advantage of the 0% interest rate on student loans right now and funnel all the money towards debt before September 30 hits

OTHER:

  • Start writing a book –> Work on it thirty minutes a day.

DSC00923

Tips on Habits

If you’re looking for inspiration – check out this ditty about the power of habits. For more creative minds who struggle with the structure of habits, may I suggest this read? Lastly, a few tips on how to make habits stick.

  • Create a path of least resistance by setting up cues and reminders for yourself to get a habit done. If you want to read every night, set a book down on your pillow when you make your bed. If you want to exercise every morning, put on your exercise clothes the minute you wake up.
  • Make it something you want to do. There are many habits you can do to get you to a goal. For example, if you want to lose weight, you can try multiple diets, stop buying plastic, get a gym membership, go on a run, do yoga in your PJs, eliminate just sugar, &c. There are many habits you can use to get you to the same goal. Choose the habit that works for you. You only need to pick one.
  • Provide motivation. Try using a habit tracker for that natural neurotransmitter kick. It’s FREE! Or try a reward system where you promise yourself something after reaching a goal using the habits you created.
  • Hold yourself accountable by sharing with a friend, or the world. Tell somebody about what you want to accomplish. Agree to get something done together with someone else. Use people around you to hold you accountable, too.
  • Make it a positive habit. Verbage is key. If you write something in a negative way, you already start with negative thoughts and your chances of success are diminished. For example, instead of writing “Spend 25% less of my weekly wages this month”, write “Pay 25% more towards credit card debt.” You feel good after your habit, instead of feeling starved.

Of course, there are many other tips and if you have one or two you’d like to share with other readers, please do!

See you in June!

 

Intentional Living: How to Curate a Minimalist Home

Growing up, I was always impressed by still-lifes and images of homes. Museum-like staging of historical dwellings on field trips and home-decor magazines alike had me imagining what my ideal house would look like. As an early twenty-something, I would peruse magazines and circle with a pen the items that I would love to own one day. Along the way, I collected trinkets here and there every time I visited Ikea, Crate and Barrel, and Target … until one day, I woke up to having too much stuff. I realized that instead of the clean, well-manicured homes that I looked up to as a teen, what I had was a very dirty rented room that held a hodge-podge of mismatched items and styles. I didn’t know who I was, which style was “me”, and I suffered many hours keeping things tidy.

These, of course, weren’t my biggest life problems – only a reflection of other aspects that bothered me about myself. After spending months (then, years after the first phase) of de-cluttering, I decided that I was not going to put in all that effort just so I can fill my space back to an over-whelming state, where I had to spend most of my free time organizing stuff, tidying up after trinkets that find their way out of their proper places like the toys from Toy Story.

Like with everything else, I decided to slow. it. down. Limit what I purchased and bought for my home, so that I could discover the whos, whats, whens, and whys of things. I wanted to be the curator of my own museum, and while homes aren’t meant to be museums themselves – they’re meant to be lived in and touched and loved and messed up, even – neither are they meant to be storage units holding symbols of our financial status. But as curator, I wanted to make sure that what I had was worth keeping.

The skill of curating doesn’t magically come from a bout of de-cluttering. In fact, I would go so far as to call it a completely separate ability that places more importance on our stewardship of what we allow in, rather than our selection of what we get rid of. You could be very good at de-cluttering without being good at maintaining your clutter. You need both skills to be able to create a minimalist space that allows for maximalist function.

With books up the wazoo about how to properly de-clutter a space, and movements that have people Marie-Kondoing their homes, I think what people still struggle with the most when creating a minimalist home is the inundation of stuffs through our doors – aka: the curation itself.

A curator for a museum needs to have a passion for the job, a knowledge about history and the arts, an eye for detail, patience and superior organizational skills. They research different pieces before deciding on one and manage the finances and lending needed to get the best piece for their space.

A curator of the home requires similar things, requiring knowledge of the self, patience, and the willingness to research options before a purchase.

Personally, I simplify the process down to three questions – which I ask of myself before I make a purchase. I ask them in the following order of importance:

Is it beautiful?

Beauty is my first question because I find that without beauty, I can easily fall out of love with something and lust after a nicer alternative. And while there are always nicer options, when you fall in love with the beauty within an everyday thing rather than the thing itself, no matter what happens to that thing or to you, you will have a sentimental connection with the piece that makes it hard to even look at another. Metaphors aside, I find that beautiful things hardly feel like clutter. A hand-made ceramic mug left sitting on the table with coffee drips dried from the lip is an artful piece on its own. A beautiful cardigan thrown over a chair looks almost staged when in reality, it was flung there forgotten after a more pressing life-matter beckoned. We are attracted to beautiful things, and of the three, sentiment is the strongest decision factor as to whether an item earns its keep. Because when something no longer becomes necessary or breaks and become dysfunctional, when it has lost its purpose and meaning, a person may still choose to keep it simply because it is beautiful.

Is it functional?

I like to think that what I own earn their keep. They do the hard work for me. They help me to not only live, but also to thrive. My things deserve my deepest gratitude for the sole reason that without them, my life would be a little less than. So it goes that my second question is to the functionality of a piece. Will it do it’s work? Is it practical? Will it hold against the tests of time? Things considered include the brand (is it reputable?), the material (I prefer iron, wood, ceramics, and linen), the maintenance (I don’t like delicate thinks that require looking after) and whether it does the job well (it must be efficient as well as easy).

Is it necessary?

This is the last question that I ask of myself, because sometimes, after you’ve determined that something is both beautiful and functional, you may also realize that you already own something else that does the same. And if two things fill the same void, then one of them will, eventually, have to go. An example that I have is tupperware. We love to cook. And we always run out of tupperware. But our tiny tupperware cabinet is 80% full with containers when all are available. I could choose to buy more containers so that we never run out, but I would hate to have a weekend where all are empty and spilling out of the tupperware cabinet. That is the exact definition of clutter! Not to mention the stress and waste of time spent on said weekend organizing tupperware into kitchen cabinets. So I refuse to buy more. Instead, I look for alternatives. I grab a casserole dish and put a lid on it. I store things in glass jars that we’ve kept instead of recycled.  Currently, on our kitchen island is a dutch oven holding everything bagels with the pot lid on to keep them from going stale. These and more, just so the home doesn’t accumulate things for the sake of having them. It’s a fun game I play. The less stuff you have, the more creative you can get.  What I’ve learned from this experiment is that in the moment, we may feel the need for something, but the moments often pass, the need – temporary. Most times, it is this final question that stops items from entering our home.

Surely, there is a long list of people who have Marie-Kondoed the ish out of their homes during quarantine. To you, I say congratulations. Before we all re-enter back into what once was, I wanted to share this tip on curating. Good judgement about what to consume can easily be clouded when we are stressed, which tends to happen at our usual pace of go-go-go. So before we return to “normal”, do recall that normal wasn’t working, and de-cluttering was more than a trend. This period has shed light on what was uncomfortable and what you felt was most important, so let’s hang on to that just a bit longer. And continue to take it slow.

Living Slow: Season of Becoming

This post is in partnership with East Fork Pottery,  a company slinging hand-thrown, timeless pottery in Oregon using regionally-sourced stoneware clay. Their beautiful food-safe glazes are made in house and lend their pieces character, but in an unfussy and classic manner. The collection is, truly, a treasure trove.

It’s been a bit quiet here for the past week, which should be indicative of the fact that I’ve been restless in real life, struggling with a personal decision that’s difficult to make. Usually that’s how it is. Cyber silence equates to a madness that requires its own space and time. But I wanted to put thought to digital paper for a moment, as an observance of this period of growth.

DSC06210

Last week, I was presented with an alternative job opportunity that, when on paper, holds better weight than my current position. However, there are some non-practical reasons why I want to keep my current position. Ultimately, it came down to production limited by the number of days, or production limited by fees. I had to consider adding a 1.5 hr  round-trip daily commute to my currently non-existent one in exchange for much easier work. I had to decide whether having newer and better materials that made my job easier was more important than sweeter and easier patients who made my job easier. I was pulled between something new and something familiar. It was a week full of angst, emotion, and pressure to make a decision. I sat by the window sill staring into space, deep in thought, reflection, and sometimes just straight up brooding. Tears were involved.

If I took the easier job that is farther away which has more difficult patients but newer materials, I would only work 2.5-3 days a week, and still make the same amount of production at 4 days a week. But when you add the hours of commute and subtract the amount of money spent on gas, those 3 days really equate to 3.6 days, and is that difference worth it. The physical work will be easier due to newer materials, but demanding patients increase the mental and emotional energy required to work. The gratitude will be centered around the ease of work, rather than meaningful work. Both cups are half-full. Which would you choose?

DSC06198

The paradox of choice is real. Both options are starkly different, but both are also good. My husband pointed out that I couldn’t go wrong either way. It’s a fantastic position to be in. But the fear of choosing wrong is what cripples. If the opportunity didn’t present itself, it wouldn’t be hard for me to continue what I was doing. There would be a distant nagging of the things I could improve if the practice were my own, but I wouldn’t be restless like I am now. When there is an alternative, it is much harder to ignore what could be.

Equally crippling is the feeling that a choice needs to be made. If I am going to leave  the first office, it would be best to tell them as soon as possible. Meanwhile, the office of opportunity is waiting on the sideline, seeing if I would take their job offer. I think it’s hard to be in-between. The pressure prevents any real growth.

In my life, I‘ve tried to reduce choice in order to increase bliss. In general, it has worked very well. While I don’t like choicelessness, I like having reduced options. But I know making choices is the hard part of growth. So choices need to be made.

I have an evasive tactic that I turn to when faced with difficult decisions. I just pick one -the one that intuitively seems most appealing – and then I move on with my life. I do that because I know I can always pivot. I do that because I know that there are worse things to choose from, and that outcomes in general are not bad  in the grand scheme of things. But I also know that I do it to alleviate the guilt, stress, and responsibility of that choice. I am only ever choosing one real thing – to run a way from my own discomfort.

This has led me to even deeper consideration for things beyond the job itself. The job, it’s just a stage in my life. In the end, neither choice is perfect, but neither is also wrong. Both are transient, not one being the end point. But I’ve thought about my tendency to run when things get difficult. My wish to reduce, in order to ease. My need to asphyxiate in hopes of control. My obsession with doing, instead of just being.

I can say I’ve been much better the past two years. Slow living has been a great mentor in that. But this is one of those moments where I need to tell myself, “Wait“. Instead of searching for clarity, wait for the fog of emotions to roll out and clear. Instead of wishing to tell people about it, wait for them to ask you of your thoughts. Instead of trying to get every answer imaginable, wait for that inner knowing to surface from within. Stay to see what happens, instead of going to see where the river runs.

I came across this quote  from @trustandtravel’s Instagram, and it spoke.

“Do not fast-forward into something you are not ready for, or allow  yourself to shrink back into what’s comfortable. Growth lives in the uneasiness. The in-between. The unfinished sentence. You are a season of becoming.”

-Danielle Doby

Becoming is a hard thing. But it’s also necessary. So much of the time, we do, and therefore we are. But we never just “be”. How do we ever expect to become?

The espresso cups in soapstone are perfect for tiny hands, mid-afternoon espresso shots, as well as after dinner green tea. For the bold, sake shots and other libations fit well within this tiny vessel. We are very much in love with this cups and can only speak highly of the quality and the beauty of these products. They are not placed in cabinets with the other dinnerware but are on display on open shelving. Today only, East Fork will be having a Seconds Sale. A discount of 30% will be applied to a handful of clay goods that did not quite make the cut. Although with slight blemishes, these pieces are still functional and beautiful. I urge people who have been hankering for dinnerware to consider salvaging these pieces and including them in your home. I appreciate East Fork for their zero waste attempt. Seconds sale begins at 12pm EST, and pieces will go fast (or so I hope). This post contains affiliate links and TheDebtist may receive a commission if  you so choose to purchase.

DSC06193